It’s Winter, It’s Cold…What the hell am I going to wear?

Ever since it snowed for the first time this year my style has been on a downward slope. Part of the problem being that I’m not getting rides to work right now, and the bus drops me off two blocks away. First I had to give up my awesome tattoo heels, because I would kill myself in them on the ice, and the new American boots from Walmart only barely resemble the really nice Canadian ones they used to sell. Those were the shit. I can’t find anything else very practical at the moment. Now I also have to make the hard decision every morning between freezing my legs and an extremely unflattering dress pants/sweater combo. I might as well show up in sweat pants and a hoodie the way THAT makes me feel. It really makes me miss working at home, on my cozy couch under a cozy blanket. What’s a girl to do?

Really, it all comes down to layering. What can you add to warm up a dress, especially a vintage style one? Well, what did they wear in the vintage era? Winter didn’t just get invented. They wore girdles, sweaters, and stockings. Full skirts of course are great with a crinoline for looks AND warmth. Spanx are super cozy, while in the summer they just make my butt itch. Then you can always add a tank top/undershirt under whatever shirt/dress you’re wearing. And 50s sweaters are so adorable I don’t know why I don’t own one yet.

On the subject of stockings, they’re actually warmer than you would expect. They’re actually comparable to pants, believe it or not. But they’re a pain to replace every wearing or two because they run all the time. The answer? Fully Fashioned stockings, the kind with the back seam that require garters. They’re made the old fashioned way, and I hear they last for YEARS. I have to get me some of those. Soon.

Speaking of pants, don’t shun them. I avoid them because I feel dumpy in them (yeah, there’s something wrong with me), I don’t find them comfortable, and dresses are just too easy. But I have been looking into 40s and 50s style pants, high-waisted with a wide leg. The wide leg reminds me of some kickass comfy emo pants I had years ago, giant black things with chains. Clearly I am now too old for these. But I really miss how they felt. I’m hoping vintage style pants would feel similar, but the high waist is throwing me off. I’m probably going to check out the mall to see if I can find something I like, but if not, I think I’ll give the pants from Freddies of Pinewood and Heyday a try. Then of course I need some tops and sweaters to go with these pants.

Topping this all off, long coats are handy. It’s a luxury if you can find a long vintage fur coat that doesn’t reek of the early 90s. Vintage coats of all kinds on Etsy are extremely affordable, easily 35-60$. Tall boots are best for pencil skirts, and short fur-lined boots are adorable with fuller skirts. Check out this picture of my meme and her sisters in the 50s. Aren’t they cute? Keep in mind this is one of the coldest cities in the world, so if it’s warm enough for them, they’re warm enough for you, unless maybe you live at the north pole.

Finally, one of my favorite little accessories is the muff. They’re so pretty and so warm. You can get them very affordably on Etsy, and they’re even easy to make. You essentially just sew a pillow, one side the width of the muff, the other side the measurement you need around your hands and arms. Then sew the ends together to form a tube. You can make these in so many ways. Remember the old Clueless episode where Cher started a muff business? You can put pockets on them, cover them in faux fur, and add a rope to hang around your neck. I got a gorgeous one on Etsy a couple years ago that looks like real wolf fur. I’ll have to remember to pull that out tomorrow!

Clearly I have yet to put a dent in my winter shopping list.

PUT SOME PANTS ON!

Pants, a skirt that doesn’t qualify as a belt, something, please (and no, leggings and tights do NOT qualify). A disturbing trend has overtaken the “kids today”, and it needs to be said once and for all, we DON’T want to see your ass. I think somewhere down the line the definitions of “sexy” and “naked” got incredibly confused and created some weird hybrid creature we now know as “trash”. Except so many fail to realize is that this is trash, and not attractive in the least. Sure some guys might like it, but only tasteless dicks, and only for a night. Please ladies, for the love of god have a little self-respect. Equality for the sexes isn’t going to get anywhere if you’re all stripping for free. Sexy and classy don’t have to be independent of each other, okay?
Now just what the hell brought on this rant? Well I admit it’s been bubbling under the surface of many of my posts made so far, but just recently I came upon this gem of a blog, FindYourPants@wordpress.com. Amen! This blogger has taken up this cause with enthusiasm, and you don’t want to be among the atrocities on this page. Nor do I want to see you looking like you’re at the gym when you’re not, or like you just rolled out of bed and into the street. When exactly did this happen to us?? Unfortunately I don’t think it will ever stop, but you as an individual CAN lead by example. Remember how in my very first post I said you are a role model for how to look good? No? Go read it. You CAN put some real clothes on and look amazing, and show other girls that they can also put clothes on and look amazing. Go on, off you go.